So True About Marriage

Just a repost from one of my favorite bloggers, the ever pretty bride to be, Patty Laurel.  This is actually a text from Joy Farney of the Grace Full Mama blog.

20 Things I Want to Tell Engaged Women

1. Marriage is made up of two good forgivers. Because every marriage is made up of two sinners. (Romans 3:23)

2. At some point, you will have to learn that life isn’t all about you. (Philippians 2:3)

3. Don’t listen to women that tell you that passion fades…it doesn’t have to! (um…all of Song of Solomon)

4. Don’t give up. Love never fails. (1 Cor. 13)

5. He wants a kind wife, not a maid or another mother. Be nice. (Galatians 5:22-23)

6. Give your husband the gift of your respect.  He needs it more than you know. (Ephesians 5:33)

7. Be mindful of your expectations.

8. Honor the Lord above all things. Colossians 3: 17

9. Find your worth and security in the Lord, and don’t look to your husband to meet all of your needs.

10. Be very careful about reading romance novels, they set you up for an unrealistic view of romance.

11. Real romance is finding that one spot in the crook of his arm to snuggle into, that shared look over the dinner table when the kids are acting crazy, and the way he fixes the leaky sink when he is dog-tired after work.

12. Love is about relationship.  The more I love my husband, and seek a relationship with him, the less critical and duty-bound I become.  It is similar to my relationship with God.

13. Be thankful for the husband you have. Accept him as he is, not for what you want him to be.

14. Don’t compare!! Don’t buy into the game of comparing him with anyone else’s husband.

15.The Biblically “normal” marriage is filled with joy, connection, laughter, and peace.  It’s not free of hurt feelings and conflict, but they know how to process their pain with one another so that they live more often in a meadow than at the scene of a train wreck.  This is not the average marriage, but it normal – -because it is a visible display of Jesus’ relationship with His bride (Ephesians 5:22-33).

16. Your marriage is a testimony! 

17. Pray for your marriage. Pray hard.

18.I’ve heard that is gets better with age.  I have to say in my short {13 year} experience, that is so true.

19. Where there is God, there is always hope. Even for the most broken marriages. “With God all things are possible.” (Matthew 19:26)

20.Marriage is commitment and sacrifice. But it’s also the best, most wild ride you will ever have with your best friend.

What We Want to Hear

I stumbled on this blog and found a link to a nice read about, well, I would say tips to show your wife that she is truly loved.   Here's a repost:

10 Things Wives Want to Hear from their Husbands

 1. “Thanks for all you do for our family.”

Yes, you work hard.  You might even feel that your load is a million times heavier than your wife’s.  But your wife works hard, too…and a little thanks goes a long way.

2. “You are a great mom and wife.”

If you really want to make her day, go beyond saying “thank you” and praise her for doing a good job.

3. “Let me do that for you.”

Your wife realizes you are exhausted when you get home from work.  She probably is too.  So offer to help out.  Start with something small like cleaning up after dinner.  Or, if you really want to score points, do the laundry or something else you normally don’t do.

4. “I love you so much.”

Did you notice the extra words, after the “I love you?”  Telling your wife you love her is a great start, but telling her why you love her, how much you love her, or that you’ll love her forever, will melt her heart.

5. “You are beautiful.”

No matter her age, her size or how long you’ve been married, a woman loves to hear that you think she’s attractive.  And, don’t just say, “You look nice.”  Instead, use adjectives like, great, lovely, fantastic.

6. “Let me watch the kids.”

If you already watch your children regularly, good job!  If you don’t, think of it this way.  When you offer to take care of the children, your wife gets to recharge her batteries.  A wife with a recharged battery is usually more patient, kind and loving.

7. “Let’s go out tonight.”

Take charge of your next date night.  This shows your wife that you enjoy spending time with her.

8. “I’m sorry you had a hard/frustrating/disappointing day.”

These words let your wife know that you are aware of what’s going on in her life.

9. “I would marry you all over again.”

In one sentence you’re telling your wife you value your life together and that you’re committed to her.

10. “How can I be a better husband to you?”

Hearing these words will either make your wife burst into tears, smile like a kid in a candy store, or, if she’s completely shocked, laugh uncontrollably.  Before you ask this question, though, be ready to hear what she has to say without being defensive.

I cannot agree more.  I'm all for communicating and hearing sweet nothings from my hubby (who, unfortunately, is exactly the opposite - fine, he says his improving bit by bit but still).  At the end of a long day, don't we wives just want to feel appreciated?  I don't ask for anything in return for all that I do for my family but gestures like this is definitely a bonus. :)

More Discoveries

Six months into married life and I don't know where to start describing the things I have learned so far (there's so many of them!). From the top of my head:

1. I can now cook. Well, not like a pro, but definitely waaaay past the thank-God-for-microwave-and-food-delivery stage back when I was still single. I am now able to prepare pork sinigang, nilagang baka, pochero, pininyahang baboy, beef guisado, tinolang manok, adobo, and pork steak AND have Jax eat it! (Meaning, it's at least edible! - hahahaha) But seriously, hubby says I'm getting better each time. Yeyyy! ;)
   
2. Keeping your own house is really different - you get more OC. My room at our house used to be messy most of the time but now? Oh no no no kalat please!!! I suddenly developed a neat freak in me! I never thought cleaning the house could take up so much of my weekend time. Everything just has to be in order and spotless - throw pillows, carpets, sink, tables, cabinets, and the list goes on...
   
3. Marriage equals compromise, especially when you have very little common ground. Getting used to always making decisions together when you've always been accustomed to doing things your way may take a while, and that's where meeting half way comes in handy. That goes even with the seemingly unimportant "issues" - like in choosing what to watch on TV, where to spend holidays, how to arrange furniture, etc. You always have to come up with a win-somehow-win situation.
   
4. Nothing beats praying and reading the Bible together. Hearing what is in the hearts of each other creates a wonderful connection between two souls. It's an amazing feeling that God makes us experience - a more "tangible" manifestation of genuine love.
   

I could write more but it would probably take me 20 years or so so this should do for now. I have read this somewhere but I might have rolled my eyes on this but right now this just sums up how I'm feeling:

You know how sometimes you'd rather stay awake than sleep because reality is better than your dreams? That's how I am when I'm with you. Like now.

Aaaaw. I hope superhubby and I stay this way for a really, really, really long time. ;)